Luske's lurkings

The other day, I came across this wonderful movie clip. It was sent to my boyfriend from his mother, who was just thinking it was cute. Little did she know that this was also based on the true story of how we are awoken avery mornging.

We have 3 alarmclocks. Every morning at 6 am, when the first of them tolls, kitty-cat comes purring and fluffy into the bed ( I actually think he spends time fluffing his fur to look extra cuddly and heart-melting).
First the purrinng and cuddling is quite friendly, after 10 minutes, when the secon alarm goes off, he commences the next step; he starts "stomping", first the duvet, then the face, and lastly, my throat.
Now, you must remember that every morning, when I "wake up",Im a zombie, my body is present, my mind is not.
By the time the 3rd alarm pierces my eardrums, Im already fast asleep againg, returing to zombieland, and this is when the ting, furry monster starts to nibble my face ( Im sure, if he could wield a baseball-bat, he would) or my toes. Or he starts experimenting how he would do as a scarf.
Finally, for "some reason", my boyfriend grows tired of this and wakes up to feed the little parasite.

5 minutes later, when Im starting to return to the lands of the living, and regain parts of my concience, kitty is back to tell me the terrible woes of being a cat in out household, he is actually not being fed!
At this point the miaowing starts; the sore, scorn sound of a cat "experiencing" starvation, absolutely able to make one's spinal cord twist.
This is when, at about 6:20, I finally get up and, "Miaowzers" lets out a sigh of relief.
I go to the bathroom to to take my daily shower,he stand staring outside the showers.
I go back to the bedroom to get dressed, he sits on the bed staring "remember me?"
I go bak to the bedroom to fix my hair, he's there too "Feed me!"

Finally, I enter "the kindom of pleasure", the kitchen, and he lets out miaows of pleasure and relief "finally, 2nd breakfast" (Kind of gives me an idea of where J.R.R. Tolkien got his idea for the hobbits and their multiple meals from).

He quickly finished the 2nd breakfast, and gets ready to lurk around to see if he can manage to loot some leftovers from out breakfast.

At this stage, I've completely returned to become fully human again, and now, I want something back for the torture.
Not a chance, the kitty schedule clearly states "Sleep", and "Do not disturb sleeping Kitty"

Isn't it wonderfull having a cat in the mornings?